Tulip Time 2009

I am exhausted. In a good way - like getting in a good workout and feeling happy with the results, like cleaning your windows and sitting in the recliner after you're done to watch them sparkle, like going water skiing and remembering why those muscles only let you do that one season out of the year - but man, is it ever worth it!

Tulip Festival is always an enjoyable, but hectic, time of year in these parts. All of us wholly (not to be confused with holy - although some may argue) Dutch, partially Dutch, or not even remotely Dutch people here in the NW corner of Iowa, dust off our wooden shoes and throw a little party known as the Tulip Festival. We are in our 69th year actully of carrying out this feat. Most every one gets involved, and we usually put on a pretty good show.

This year was no different except that it was way MORE enjoyable and just a bit more hectic. We were honored to have the Nieburhs (The Captain's sister and family) and Gordons (the Captain's mom and step-dad) visit. That meant 7 more warm bodies in the house. Better find yourself a piece of floor and stake your claim type of deal. I think the whole Tulip Time thing gets a little redundant and hum-drum to those of us who have experienced it since childbirth. It is a really neat thing to see it through the eyes of someone who hasn't been there, done that. Makes you appreciate it all the more. We made our list, and checked it twice, and think we got everything accomplished in due order.

Sam, Will, Max, Marissa and Maren had more fun than there is almond paste in an almond pattie. The girls are still in a state of shock and despair as they wander about forlornly looking for their cousins. Not that they didn't love have their Grandma and Papa Joe here too - because they sure loved that too.

So , I don't really know how to tell you all we did. I'll just let the pictures do the talking. Also go check out my SIL's blog, KimNow, for more great photos.

The tulips were just the biggest show-offs this year, don't you think?

Speaking of show-offs, ever since the Captain saw this bike, he has been hankering to ride it in the Tulip Festival so he could show off his biking skills. I think he would agree, it was a bit harder than it looked. He did a great job though and did us all proud...

...except when he nearly took out his mom (the lady in the striped shirt crossing the street) on his Dutch Big Wheel. She did take the time to offer him a cheese curd though, so no hard feelings. Oh my, I am still laughing.
So, we are taking reservations for next year. Kent? Ready to slip on those wooden shoes? I know you miss them. Kim? Wanna scrub some streets? I think it is our turn next year. Mom? Joe? Can you HANDLE another year? Breng ons een bezoek! Pay us a visit!!

P.S. Thanks to my MIL Pat for some of letting me take and publish some of these pics. I have camera envy.

P.S.S. Baloney, if your out there, Flat Baloney got lost in the shuffle (or the shuffle, clomp, clomp of the wooden shoes more precisely) somewhere, but there is always next year!!

Seven Signs of Spring in NW Iowa

1. Costumes. It's all about the costumes, baby. Spring means the girl's annual dance recital and the Tulip Festival. Dance and Dutch costumes required.

2. Farm equipment traffic jams. The farmers are getting the land ready to plant. Corn and beans and oats. Oh my. The John Deeres are in abundant supply. They are also doing some Spring Cleaning. I had the distinct privilege of following a "Honey Wagon" while on my way to Walmart the other day. This is not the honey bee made honey variety. Think liquid excrement of the horrendously stinky variety. Here's a picture. That will make the horror last longer. Thankfully they are not "spreading" as they go down the road - but they do drip a little.

3. Garage sales. This marks the weekend of the city wide garage sale held every Spring and Fall. We nearly double our population and there are Dutch people running amok all with the intent of getting a really good deal on someone else's junk.

4. Reflective white skin. We have had some nice weather here. Enough to get out the shorts. It is a sad thing to see exactly how pasty everyone has gotten over the long winter. There is a low glow emanating from the elementary school with the kids showing their pasty white legs. They could seriously give Edward Cullen a run for his money. Refer to my ghostly girls in their dance costumes. They look a little anemic, huh? But adorably cute anemic. There's a difference.

5. Street Sweeping. Yep, we get out the old street sweeper out here in these parts. Blame it once again on the weird Dutch gene. They seem to add to the aforementioned traffic jams in number 2. Remember the term traffic jam is used loosely in NW Iowa.

6. Parental Birthday season. My Dad's b-day is tomorrow. My mom's is May 2. Then there is Mother's Day. The Captain's dad's b-day is on May 19. Father's Day. Then July is Birthday month in our household. Both M's have birthday's in July. I must have only been fertile in late October.

7. End of the school year just around the corner. I have been out of school for 20 years now, yet I forget that I actually don't get the summers off. I get this expectant hope of a break and then I remember I am an adult and I still need to work through June, July and August. Let's get Obama on the line and see what he can do about that. That's a change that would do us all some good.

Happy Spring!! I LOVE IT!

Weekend Highlights

Not much going on in the IA Pilot Wife household this weekend, which is fine. Really. I was ready to regroup and realign and renew and all that other good re- stuff. Word of warning, the weekend highlights are not so spectacular, so if you're expecting lottery winnings or octomoms or AIG death threats - you need to go read yourself another blog.

1. I splashed myself in the mouth with toilet water/toilet bowl cleaner residue water as I was paying homage to the weird Dutch gene and getting particularly aggressive with the grungy toilet bowl. UGH. Super Ugh. Ugh on steroids. (I warned you to keep your expectations low. ) So if I die of septicemia or toilet bowl cleaner poisoning in the next couple days - you heard it here first. Things can only get better, right?

2. I did get my house cleaned. Curse the weird Dutch gene.

3. Princess Maren greeted me by crawling in my bed EARLY Saturday morning with her happy shiny face and no fever. Why is it she always wakes up early on Saturday morning and on any other day of the it takes a stick of dynamite and a small crane to get her out of bed? WHY? Glad she is feeling better though and a cuter alarm clock is yet to be discovered.

4. My relatives in Denver, Wichita, and Tulsa all got snow this weekend. Iowa did not. When does that ever happen? Sorry ya'll, but I am secretly smiling inside - just a little - and just this weekend - because I know things could look much different different here down the road.

5. Marissa and I watched the end of the Incredibles on TV together Saturday night. Did you know she has this spot just below her collarbones where she is REALLY ticklish. If we are sitting in the chair together (which we were) it is in the perfect spot to inconspicuously pretend that I am going to give her a hug (which I did) and go in for the kill. TICKLE TORTURE. It is always good to check (which I also did) if she has gone to the bathroom first (which she had). Fun.

6. I had homemade tamales and buneulos for lunch today. Can you say delicioso? Muy Bien? Magnifico, excellente, y mas por favor? Our church started a Bible Study to reach out to the Hispanic community in town. They, in turn, wanted to reach out and do something to help those less fortunate than themselves. So, they made homemade tamales and buneulos to sell to the congregation and all proceeds would go to The Bridge here in town. They made over 1200 tamales. Talk about a ministry. In word and in deed. It left quite an impression on my mind and my heart, but also on my waistline I am afraid. Thanks ladies!

7. And now for the lucky number seven. The best part of my weekend was the 59 minutes and 26 seconds I spent talking to my good friend in Tulsa. She is stuck in a motel room by herself after receiving a radiation treatment and for the safety of her family and others has to remain there until Wednesday. See, we had sort of lost track of each other over the past couple years, and they have obviously been a bit trying for her. Yet she considers herself "lucky" and "thankful". The prognosis is good.

As we talked, so many memories came flooding back - a Yorkie terrier wreaking havoc on our apartment kitchen over the course of a night shift, me backing into the parking lot support pole and chocolate muffins flying all over the car, crushes on Dr.'s later found out to be "happy", and always wondering if Arlene, while nodding off at the desk, would fall out of her chair and what in the world would we do if it did happen? She is a good friend. The best.

We had a lot to catch up on. Families and disappointments, Parkinson's disease and diabetes, Iowa versus Oklahoma, CHF and dementia, and Norwegian scabies. Yep, scabies. Really. I'm praying for you, girl! Love ya!


So, all in all, a pretty fine weekend. Toodles!

Old Dutch Cleanser ... Updated Version

Really, why do I do it? Talk about an exercise in futility. After taking it easy last Tuesday - I am back to the usual routine. My house is clean, but why, why bother? My bathroom, 2 hours post spotlessness is now nicely encrusted with a layer of slimy toothpaste slithering down the sink ala Princess Maren. Floor, once freshly Swiffered is now tracked with soap scummed footprints from Sweet Marissa in search of a book to read while bathing.

I must have enough of that weird Dutch gene that finds fulfilment and calling in keeping her house clean. Mind you, I am not obsessively clean. This is coming from someone who in high school came home to her clothes being thrown out her bedroom window onto the roof of the garage by her father. His threat was not an idle one. (I am, by the way, keeping that one in the arsenal for future use with our girls.) I did not keep my room very clean at all in high school. Who knew what sort of disease and pestilence spawned in the nether-regions under my bed. So, to have made it this far is some sort of small miracle. I do find myself in a much better mood when my house is clean.

So the Captain and I were chatting on FB and we got into a discussion about toilets. I know! There should be better things to chat about. But, a nurse can talk about most any bodily function and fluid it might involve without too much pause, and then go eat her lunch. We often talk of these things in our household. But, the Captain was saying they have these really cool toilets in Japan that are heated, give you a nice little cleaning - if you get my drift, and then play a cute little flushing song when you are through. He thinks there may be a market for that in the US. When the Captain is not being the Captain, he is really Professor Gadget. The man has an imagination. Naturally, I had to Google it and YouTuble it.


He was right! There are all sorts of YouTube videos heralding the praises of the Japanese toilets. I saw only one thing that could be improved upon and that would be a self cleaning option, ( not the human, but the actual toilet) now that would be glorious. And then I found this.



Will wonders never cease!! Now if the Captain could market this in the US, all us crazy Dutch women in NW Iowa would go out and buy one and single handedly save the US economy.